A Right Royal Response

A girl called Kate kissed a boy called William and when she said “I do” she became a princess. It is the stuff of fairytales, but whether they live happily ever after remains to be seen.
Our house was a royal wedding free zone, but my girls still managed to find out about it. Eight year old Ruby tracked down a youtube clip of Kate arriving at Westminster Abbey and, like girls and women all over the world, checked out her wedding dress. (Is there a chromosome they have that attracts them to shoes and wedding dresses?)
“I wish I could be a princess,” she sighed.
At which point I had to point out that Harry was too old for her and any future offspring of Kate and William would be too young for her. There may be some more obscure princes lurking out there somewhere who would sweep a North Coast country girl off her feet, but the odds are against her.
The charming prince who rescues the girl from a perilous predicament is a recurring theme in children’s literature, so it’s not surprising she has bought into the whole princess fantasy. I tried to explain to her that the life of a princess may not be all it’s cracked up to be and told her “the sad story of Princess Diana” who, unlike the all the other princesses she knew, lived her life under the constant spotlight of the paparazzi’s cameras and died in a tragic car crash.
One good thing about the royal wedding is that it has re-ignited some reassessment of Australia’s relationship with the monarchy and the perennial question about whether we should become a republic raised its sleepy head again. Ever since I was old enough to understand the concepts involved I have been a strong supporter of the idea that Australia should throw off the final shackles of British colonialism and appoint our own head of state. But as we don’t seem to be able to agree on a model, I would like to suggest a radical new idea: our own monarchy.
Democracy is over-rated. The modern two party system is so fundamentally flawed that it needs to be assassinated in a carefully planned attack and have its body dumped at sea. Essentially it has been reduced to a popularity contest where figureheads representing various vested interests try to convince an apathetic population that the other mob can’t be trusted.
What we need is a benevolent dictator with a long term vision for the country. He or she would be able to pick and choose the best person for the job to head up a ministry, unrestricted by factional party politics or the fear that someone will knife them in the back and steal their job.
I would like to nominate Bob Brown (Green King Brown?) as our inaugural monarch. That fact that he is unlikely to produce an heir should not be a restriction. When Bob is ready to abdicate he can nominate his own successor or he can run his own reality TV show (So you think you can rule?)
So maybe my North Coast country girl won’t be a princess, but in this brave new world she could aspire to be Queen.